The Crash Course has been moved here to the Pages section. You can still read some readers’ Comments below.
John Raible Online
Supporting the Transracial Adoption community through education and research
The Crash Course has been moved here to the Pages section. You can still read some readers’ Comments below.
Deal. I’ve got a lot of work ahead of me. I am forever grateful for this list already and I haven’t even scratched the surface. I have an adult adoptee blog roll on my blog…does that count for anything? Ha! I will add the other blogs you have mentioned as well. Seriously, just that step alone has opened my eyes even more.
Thank You!!! This is a list I have dreamed of finding- pointing me in the right direction and pretty much just telling me what to do.
I am a new AP to an unbelievably gorgeous and funny little wonder from Ethiopia whose strength through what she has lived through daily amazes us. But I KNOW we don’t possess everything she needs, and I want to GROW. This list- the books, the movies, the blogs, the activities- these will all help me do just that. I know I will never be the perfect trans-racial parent… but I also plan on learning and growing so that I can do my best. She deserves no less.
Again, thank you!
One thing: where can I find these movies?
Where can these books and movies be found? Netflix did not have any of the movies and my library only had one of the books.
look forward to reading more of the books and seeing more of the movies on your list. it’s local to san francisco bay area, but perhaps a link to “An Ungrateful Daughter” one-woman show?
Here is another very useful resource for parents adopting children of another race than their own – a children’s book series which aids in the development of a positive self esteem and self image. The books are a part of the program Believe In Me in which the overall purpose of the program is to provide positive literature to encourage and empower all children to believe in themselves with determination and faith while discovering and using perseverance for success and overcoming obstacles in life.
Believe In Me gives parents the support needed to raise confidence levels in children. It provides resources for the educators, support workers and community members while helping children develop to their best level as individuals. This program creates ways for all children, in every part of the country, in building positive self esteem from within. Why Can’t You Look Like Me and Where Do I Belong are the first two of six titles in the program. These books open children up to having to deal with their feelings when they are unsure of how to feel. They offer a distinctly broader view of dealing with situations any child may experience that is on the level of the child. Next, the books emphasize roles to actively teach and encourage the child to believe in what is inside of himself / herself and not on what others may say or want for him/her. The variety of subjects to be included in the series include family, belonging, fitting in, identity, adoption, foster care, and most importantly is building a positive self esteem and a positive self confidence within the children.
Believe In Me has a very important goal: To aid with the healing process for the next generation. I believe that the more support a child has in healing self then the better chance the child has of finding self!
I’m in!! Thanks so much for the course.
Thank you for this! Would that the people who need it most be willing to do even some of it. Of course, we all need it and will benefit greatly. I’m going to follow it and let you know how it goes.
We’re with a Wide Horizons. We had to do, maybe 20 hours of education. One afternoon we had to go sit for a few others with other people adopting transracially and listened to a woman who had adopted but not transracially. We are an interracial couple with a 7 year old bio child (who is often mistaken for my adopted child.) It felt like we ran the course at the time. I was so disappointed. I felt like I needed so much and we were left there with so many questions. The one thing they did do was show us the video that you are in. It made me start googling adult adoptees and I found the websites that you list here and others. Thank goodness. Thank you for righting and working so hard.
Of all the things written here I would say “listen to the adoptees” is the key.
You forgot a big one, John: MOVE out of Whitesville =)
Thanks, John. This Crash Course is AWESOME! I’ve been thinking lately about my transformation as an AP. Four years ago I was the typically “love is enough,” colorblind parent waiting for my son to come home from Korea. Then I was offended by the blogs of adult adoptees. Today I’m regularly engaged in conversations and debates with friends and family about race and adoption. Now I read the adult adoptee blogs at least once a week to continue my education and help me become an ally. Change is possible for APs if they’re willing to hear the truth from those who have been there.
(Hi, John – apologies if this post comes through twice: i tried to post this morning and my browser crashed, so I’m not sure if it made it into the moderation queue or not)
Thanks for putting together this crash course – your insight and experience are valuable resources to me as an adoptive father to a child of another race. Since I gathered links to all the resources that you listed, I figured it might be worthwhile to post them here to make them more accessible to your readers (they are listed in the same order in which you presented the titles.)
Books
http://www.ifapa.org/pdf_docs/TransracialParenting.pdf
Blogs
http://harlowmonkey.typepad.com/harlows_monkey/
http://yoonsblur.blogspot.com/
http://seumnida.annyeong.net/
http://johnraible.wordpress.com/
http://kadnexus.wordpress.com/
http://twicetherice.wordpress.com/
Movies
http://www.adoptedthemovie.com/
http://www.artsengine.net/store/items/outside_looking_in_transracial_adoption_in_america
http://www.pbs.org/pov/firstpersonplural/
http://www.mufilms.org/films/matter-of-cha-jung-hee/
http://www.photosynthesisproductions.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=blogcategory&id=10&Itemid=27
http://www.photosynthesisproductions.com/store/catalog/product/view/id/168/s/struggle-for-identity-special-edition-dvd-2007/
Thanks John for bringing sense to the adoption world and for attempting to help others make changes.There’s a long way to go.
You may want to check http://eag-oncewasvon.blogspot.com for facts, figures and views.
thank you very much!
there is a brand new movie “Mother and Child” – I’ve seen a promising looking trailer. Any thoughts?
Thanks Dr. Raible!
I have read some of the books you listed, frequent your blog, Harlow’s Monkey and I use to visit Twice the Rice, but had thought she quit blogging. I also recently discovered another blog, Faith and Illusions. The blogger is an adult adoptee, transracially adopted and an adoptive parent.
We are white and are adoptive parents to two beautiful little girls who were born in China. I have done a lot of reading about adoption, transracial adoption, China’s history (mostly Mao related), and when possible about Asian-American experiences.
The Faith and Illusions blog lists a series of questions for potential adoptive parents (or already adoptive parents) to answer about why we are adopting. I think the list of questions is great. One of the questions asks the AP about their opinon of their child’s birthmom. I always think about my daughter’s birhtmom– how can one not? I see her all the time. She is beautiful, loving, full of life, loves to laugh, head strong, smart, funny . . .
There are so many mixed feelings– I am so happy to be a mom– adoption was the only way it would happen for me. I know the loss and anger I felt as a rational (quasi– definitely not fully) adult accepting this fate.
Opression in China, espeically for woman and concerning family planning, is beyond my ability to truly understand how it would feel– how must it feel to be a pregnant woman in China and know that if you give birth to a girl you will not be able to raise her? Anger? Despair? Resolve to somehow move on? I don’t know the answers to any of this– part of the problem– we will never know. I feel so much compassion for both of my daughters first mom– it breaks my heart to think of what they have lived through– and continue to live to never knowing.
My girls are still very young– 3 1/2 and 28 months– as they get older I expect them to be angry at times– maybe long times. Who wouldn’t be? It makes me angry– and yet I am the one who benefitted greatly from this injustice.
I want to learn the best way to be there for them and support them. I wish I could protect them from the pain I know they will feel and the loss they will feel– but I know that I cannot– no matter how much I love them– no matter how much they love me, their dad, their siblings– only they can work through that pain and that loss– Nobody else can do it for them.
So I thank you and all Adult Adoptees for doing what you can to help adoptive parents like me learn the best way to support our children and be better parents and allies to them.
Here is a link to one of the readings
http://www.ifapa.org/pdf_docs/transracialparenting.pdf
The movie “Adopted” is on Netflix and I think it is the same as the longer title listed here (someone please correct me if I’m wrong).
You can watch the movie Outside Looking In here
http://blacktv247.com/videowatch.asp?VideoID=516
I’m learning so much already!!
We have started a group to get through this course together. Thanks for the inspiration. Please come by and visit us!!!! http://traparenting.wordpress.com/about/
I’m going to post this on our WACAP Ethiopia Adoption Yahoo Board…thank you for the great info!!!
Re the films: Deann Borshay Liem’s films (First Person Plural and In the Matter of Cha Jung Hee) can be purchased or rented from the Center for Asian American Media. There’s a link to this site at Mu Films, Deann’s site: http://www.mufilms.org/buy-dvds.php.
Excellent resources, thanks for posting.
Sheesh John, you need to post a “no drinking or eating” warning. I nearly had food coming out of my nose when I got to the end of the first paragraph!
These are fabulous recommendations. May I also suggest some additional adoptee blogs I subscribe to which have been a helpful part of my AP journey?
http://notsocalm.wordpress.com/
http://heartmindandseoul.typepad.com/weblog/
http://sisterheping.wordpress.com/
http://birthproject.wordpress.com/
There’s one more, not written by an adult adoptee, but which addresses important issues in raising children of color:
http://loveisntenough.com/ (aka Anti-Racist Parent – Carmen is “retiring” but the archives of this blog are still up and oh-so-well-worth the read).
Hello! This is a great post! It’s all over the blogosphere!!! Thanks heaps for linking me, too.
excellent posts. i’ve got a few more books/dvd’s to add to the many i’ve seen already. i am always on the hunt- and what a great resource this post is.
i’d only add one more blogger to your list: Raina at Faiths and Illusions, adoptee, adoptive parent. Excellent read (she got me here to this post!).
thank you for this. i’m going to post a link on my blog.
Taking the course Mr.Raible, thank you.
Great, inclusive list of reading material on transracial adoption. Thanks for posting the additional adoption blogs in the comments section as well. Keeping this page in my favorites.